Unworthy Thoughts

Do you swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

When you hear, “Do you swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth?” in a courtroom, you acknowledge that the court is seeking your account of a situation based on the facts only. Not on your opinions. That’s why they ask for only the truth, and nothing but the truth. They don’t want you opinionated bias weighing in on the minds of the jurors.

Here’s an example:

“That awful man. I just hate him. He is a no good piece of person and ever since he came into my daughter’s life he has wreaked havoc. Just like that dreadful night. How dare he violate the restraining order and enter her house like he still had a right to do so. He’s just garbage.”

That is obviously the opinionated account. Now let’s break it down into just the facts.

That man (pointing to the defendant) entered my daughter’s house on the evening of Tuesday, March 11th, thereby violating the restraining order filed against him.

See the difference. Just the facts, no elaboration, no extra bias.

It’s harder to do than you might think. In fact, we are so naturally trained to drop in our viewpoint, that even little things like the description of a situation can be clouded by our judgment.

This morning as my son and I are hanging out, he decided to check the weather. He first asks Alexa what’s the weather for today. She reports back that it is 55 currently with cloudy skies. The high today is 65 with a chance of thunderstorms.

Pretty clear reporting of the facts. And you may not be surprised because we’re getting a report from artificial intelligence. But then he got my iPhone and started asking Suri for her report of the weather and that’s when we noticed the difference.

Since he had our local weather, he decided to check out other places around the country (for some reason this fascinates him). He began with San Diego, CA. She reports first that, “It’s not looking too good today.” Then she gives the temp and the high.

He does another area in California and hear’s a similar response, “It’s not looking too good today.” And he exclaims, “What is she talking about? That seems like pretty nice weather to me. Look sunshine too.”

You see, even a child caught on to the relaying of opinions versus facts.

I just checked the weather again for San Diego as I’m writing this post a few hours later and now Siri reports that, “It seems pretty good in San Diego, CA…for now, anyway.”

She’s such a pessimist. She also reports the lows as the worst-case scenario when giving the weather. Alexa looks at things on the positive and gives the highs.

I’m thinking that whoever programmed Siri is a glass half empty kind of a person.

So what do these examples of stating just the facts have to do with you?
Very simply, the thoughts that you are believing as truth, may in fact not be. It is possible, especially if you are holding on to unworthy thoughts, that you have adopted an opinion as truth.

The most natural way this happens for people is they adopted the viewpoint of an adult – often times a parent or other meaningful influence – as a young child and have not ever shaken free of that perspective. They have held it tight as truth in their life.

We act out in our lives what we believe to be true based on the power we have given to our thoughts.

Stefanie Edwards

Imagine a parent struggling with money, raised you to think money was scarce, and any money you got was hard to earn. That sets you up to have limiting money beliefs in life. Thoughts that money is challenging to earn money and life is a big struggle to keep the bills paid. You may become stingy and ungenerous because you’re always afraid you’re going to run out of money.

As you’re taking this in, you might be thinking that’s a ludicrous thought. What a bad example. That indicates that your thoughts are not hampered by thinking money is in limited supply. You don’t hold on to this limiting belief.

But on the other hand, you might be nodding in agreement and even feeling the need to check on your account balance to make sure that last bill didn’t overdraw your account. For you, this is reality because you believe this.

We act out in our lives what we believe to be true based on the power we have given to our thoughts.

Some thoughts have become so ingrained in our minds, that we don’t even know to stop and look at them as thoughts. Just like this money example. We just think it is the truth. But in fact, the truth is money exists as currency to exchange products and services. Money is available in a variety of formats and accessible in a variety of ways. 

That’s about as plainly as I can state a fact about money. You could then add on to that the thought that if money is accessible in a variety of ways, there may be the opportunity to earn more money outside of the way you currently are obtaining it.

That’s how the rich get richer. They see possibilities to earn money where most never look. Because most are holding on to limiting money beliefs that prohibit them from seeing money as available in greater supply.

I relate to this example because I have struggled so much with money beliefs in my life and career. For years I worked and was underpaid based on my worth. But I struggled to see another option. I would apply for a new job and interview just to become afraid of asking for more money and end up settling essentially back at the same income range I had before. Why?

Because I had so many negative thoughts about money ingrained in my mind, that I naturally assumed the person interviewing me held that same belief. That the company, no matter how large, must not be willing to pay a higher salary. Even though I wasn’t asking for it to even find out! Do you see the madness of this situation?

It’s easier to see what someone else is experiencing, but for me, I could not and as a result, I rarely had money in savings and was always was living paycheck to paycheck. That cycle only validated my thoughts about money and kept me stuck there.

But if I could have learned to change my thoughts and start to work through the things I thought were true, I could have altered my reality. How do I know that is possible? Because now that I have embraced a bigger view of money, I have seen evidence of the possibilities. I have met people who started out like me but now have acquired abundant wealth.

Our minds will continue to find the evidence to support the truth we believe. Unless we take the time to reflect, stop, and consider another option.

That’s why the prosecutor doesn’t want you giving your opinions in court. It can sway the way that the jurors think and once they start to latch on to a thought, it’s hard to shake away from it.

I remember serving as a juror one time in a drunk driving case. I have not personally been impacted by drunk driving, but I am opposed to it on ethical principles. If you want to drink in excess, that’s your deal, but don’t drive and put others at risk due to your irresponsible behavior. I brought that thought into the case. I was in full support of the evidence presented that he was guilty. I was grateful there was ample evidence to support the case because I wanted to find him guilty. The case seemed so clear to me. But when we went to deliberate on his verdict, a room full of jurors, I was utterly shocked to discover that over half of the room did not see the evidence as clearly as I did. And we argued for a few hours to come to a decision.

Same facts. Pretty clearly presented without opinions. And yet, our personal thoughts impacted how we received that information and processed it.

Thoughts are so powerful because they create our feelings and behaviors.

If you’d like to explore your thoughts with a fresh perspective consider trying out a life coach trained on holding space for you to examine your thoughts. If you like my style and want to see if we’d be a good connection, visit https://calendly.com/marketingday/consult20 to schedule a complimentary 20-minute consult.

Until next time, here’s to clean thoughts that serve you!